The un-Doing.

The Undoing.jpeg
copyright  Mongkol Chuewong / Adobe Stock Images

Over the years I’ve identified a strong correlation between Doing too much and an increased experience of stress and tension (revelatory – I know).  I can now immediately identify the beginnings of physical symptoms that tell me I’m running around too much and not checking in with myself enough- mostly skin and digestive issues. My emotional and physical red flags are my body’s way of tugging on my sleeve, asking me to please take a breath and listen to it so it needn’t resort to transforming into the Incredible Hulk. Which, if I ignore it long enough, it always does (See: Monster-in-a-Box).  

Putting a stop to all the Doing is an act of significant courage and intention. In the absence of Doing, avoided, ignored, and neglected Parts of ourselves come galloping up to the surface like retrievers with bones, desperate to engage in raucous play. Since there is no one there to contend with them but ourselves, we alone must engage with these Parts, and take care of them. Depending on what they have to share, this can be a truly Hard thing.

And so sometimes instead, we run around. We buy stuff and rearrange it again and again, we purge stuff and acquire new stuff. Sometimes we work fourteen hours every day for a week. We don’t stop for illness, or the need for sleep. We are heralded for being hard workers and perfectionists, but the reality is often that the Doing of All of This is so much easier and less intimidating than getting in touch with what’s happening inside our hearts and our heads, and we welcome the distractions.  

In my own Self-Work, I am doing my best to move towards a lifestyle that encourages intention and self-exploration, while being as gentle and kind to myself as possible. This of course involves embracing slowing down and going inward to see what’s happening in there; daily, if possible. Despite my best efforts, some days I get caught up in the Doing and just can’t make it happen. I repeat to myself that there is no failure in this: Doing is simply an expression of a (very stubborn) Part of myself, and that Part needs attention, too. And, each moment presents a new opportunity to slow down, to breathe, and to take the next step intentionally, with self-assuredness, with purpose, with love. 

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Some frequently asked questions and useful answers.

Online therapy works in the same way as in-office therapy, but is done online, similar to a Skype or FaceTime conversation. Clients are able to have sessions from home, work, or any other convenient location. We meet with clients using a HIPAA-compliant secure platform.

Online therapy allows you to work with us from the comfort of home, or any private location of your choosing. For some, the screen provides an added layer of comfort that makes the challenging work of being vulnerable in therapy a little easier.

Online therapy also creates the unique opportunity for you to work with us without the constraints of proximity! The practice was born in Keene, New Hampshire, but has since grown to service clients anywhere in Massachusetts, Pennsylvania, Connecticut, Vermont, New Jersey, Florida, and New Hampshire.

Online therapy is a great option for clients that travel for work, for college students that go home during the summertime and do not want a break in their sessions, and for anyone with a challenging or inconsistent day-to-day schedule. It is an excellent choice for clients seeking a therapist with a particular specialty that they are unable to find support for locally. Some of our clients report that online therapy makes the vulnerability element of therapy a bit less intimidating.

No. For some clients with more complex symptoms or safety concerns, having a local therapist that is readily available is important in case of crisis or the need for a higher level of care. Online therapy is also a challenge for clients that do not have access to a private, quiet space to be “in session” for the hour, or for those that do not have adequate internet connectivity.

There are several reasons why we don’t accept insurance. The most important are:

Confidentiality. Insurance companies require that your information be shared with them in order to pay for services. We prefer that clients’ information is kept as confidential as possible.

The pressure to diagnose. Insurance companies require that clients are given a mental health diagnosis in order to pay for therapy. We have found that many clients benefit from therapy, but do not meet criteria for a diagnosis. Not using insurance allows clients to access therapy without being given a mental health diagnosis.

Flexibility and freedom. Insurance companies dictate the length and number of sessions they will authorize, as well as when a client is no longer eligible for the benefits of therapy. Because we do not work with insurance panels, you and we can collaborate to determine your individual needs regarding session length, frequency of sessions, and when to terminate therapy.

While we do not accept insurance, many clients choose to submit receipts to their insurance companies to receive reimbursement via out-of-network benefits. We are happy to provide these receipts for you! Please check with your insurance company for details on your benefits.



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