It’s A Match!

I was recently doing an online training by Judith Matz (she’s good – if you treat eating issues, she’s one to check out), and she kept using a simple little phrase that I just loved. When describing the process of attuned eating, she introduced the concept of the Good Match. To illustrate: A person checks in with themselves, determines that their body is hungry, and is particularly wanting pasta with some vegetables. And maybe some cheese. They prepare themselves a plate of pasta with red sauce, a side salad with oil and vinegar and a decent helping of gorgonzola, sit down and eat it mindfully. It does the trick. They feel satiated and well. It’s a Good Match. 

Simple, but there’s something poetic about it. I think it’s the stress-free feeling attached to it: a check in with yourself, a recognition of what you want and need in the moment, an action to do what you can to meet those wants/needs without judgment, a judgment call that it’s good, and the permission to move on. Making Good Matches throughout the day, food-wise, is liberating and empowering for individuals with issues with food, their bodies, and eating. A Good Match for breakfast. A Good Match for dinner. A hundred Good Matches lead us to a healthier relationship with food and our bodies. 

I think this notion of the Good Match is transferrable. In the therapy room, we often spend time looking at areas of life that don’t feel like they’re working very well – the intolerable stress of work, for instance, or the trickiness of navigating an ultimately toxic relationship. A tendency, often, is to assume that the problem lives within us, and that if we could only figure out how to be more____ or do more ____ or feel less ___, we’d suddenly discover that the job is fulfilling, or that the relationship works. And hey, sometimes, this is the case. We need to do the work to move into a space of greater wellness. 

And other times – it’s just not a Good Match. 

Think of how freeing it would be to let go of all the Bad Matches in our lives! The people we never feel good around, the work we don’t feel safe or appreciated for doing, the value systems and attitudes that no longer feel true for us…the space that these negative elements might leave us is potentially enormous. What could we fill that space with? Creative endeavors? Adventuring? Thriving relationships? Self-exploration? All of the Self-Work we’ve been missing out on while we’ve been beating ourselves up for the things we should be doing better, that just aren’t Good Matches for us? What might be possible? 

It’s exciting to consider, this notion of the Good Match. Can we start by considering the major areas of our lives, and if they feel like Good Matches? Our jobs. Our primary relationships. What we do with our free time. Where we live. How we take care of ourselves emotionally and physically. Are these things what we want and need them to be? Are they Good Matches?

How can we commit to prioritizing making Good Matches, and see what happens? 


Useful Information

Some frequently asked questions and useful answers.

Online therapy works in the same way as in-office therapy, but is done online, similar to a Skype or FaceTime conversation. Clients are able to have sessions from home, work, or any other convenient location. We meet with clients using a HIPAA-compliant secure platform.

Online therapy allows you to work with us from the comfort of home, or any private location of your choosing. For some, the screen provides an added layer of comfort that makes the challenging work of being vulnerable in therapy a little easier.

Online therapy also creates the unique opportunity for you to work with us without the constraints of proximity! The practice was born in Keene, New Hampshire, but has since grown to service clients anywhere in Massachusetts, Pennsylvania, Connecticut, Vermont, New Jersey, Florida, and New Hampshire.

Online therapy is a great option for clients that travel for work, for college students that go home during the summertime and do not want a break in their sessions, and for anyone with a challenging or inconsistent day-to-day schedule. It is an excellent choice for clients seeking a therapist with a particular specialty that they are unable to find support for locally. Some of our clients report that online therapy makes the vulnerability element of therapy a bit less intimidating.

No. For some clients with more complex symptoms or safety concerns, having a local therapist that is readily available is important in case of crisis or the need for a higher level of care. Online therapy is also a challenge for clients that do not have access to a private, quiet space to be “in session” for the hour, or for those that do not have adequate internet connectivity.

There are several reasons why we don’t accept insurance. The most important are:

Confidentiality. Insurance companies require that your information be shared with them in order to pay for services. We prefer that clients’ information is kept as confidential as possible.

The pressure to diagnose. Insurance companies require that clients are given a mental health diagnosis in order to pay for therapy. We have found that many clients benefit from therapy, but do not meet criteria for a diagnosis. Not using insurance allows clients to access therapy without being given a mental health diagnosis.

Flexibility and freedom. Insurance companies dictate the length and number of sessions they will authorize, as well as when a client is no longer eligible for the benefits of therapy. Because we do not work with insurance panels, you and we can collaborate to determine your individual needs regarding session length, frequency of sessions, and when to terminate therapy.

While we do not accept insurance, many clients choose to submit receipts to their insurance companies to receive reimbursement via out-of-network benefits. We are happy to provide these receipts for you! Please check with your insurance company for details on your benefits.



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