Self-Care versus Life-Care (or, how to talk about caring for the self in a way that’s actually meaningful)

I was at lunch with a group of friends the other day when I announced that I’m over the whole notion of self-care. It is no longer interesting to me, and I think it's a rather poor promoter of true health and wellness. Stay with me, here.  Self-care has been reduced to clickbait. It’s a … Continue reading Self-Care versus Life-Care (or, how to talk about caring for the self in a way that’s actually meaningful)

Your Very Own Monster-In-A-Box

Therapists come up with all sorts of terminology to name this and that - we work with the same problems and ideas repeatedly, and need images and language to describe human experience. Sometimes we come up with our own labels and concepts. The Monster-in-a- box is one of mine. The Monster is the thing that … Continue reading Your Very Own Monster-In-A-Box

Is “Powering Through It” Really A Good Thing?

I recently received a text citing a friend doing something that was hard for him, and struggling with it. “It’s ok, though,” said the text, “he’s powering through it.”  “Blech,” I thought to myself. Then I typed “Is that really actually good, though?”.  And then I deleted it, because nobody was asking for my opinion … Continue reading Is “Powering Through It” Really A Good Thing?

Connection is essential, and difficult to come by.

  There is a unique grief to the end of my thirties. In many ways, this decade has been liberating and exciting. Like many people of my generation, I’ve finally hit a stride in my career that includes feeling both competent and skilled and fairly compensated for my work. I live in a home with … Continue reading Connection is essential, and difficult to come by.

Gardening is like self-work (and I’m not the best at it)…

I kill all things green. This is my truth around gardening and, though I’m deeply unhappy about it, it’s factual. If you give me a plant I will kill it. Consider yourself warned- please don’t gift me plantlife. That said, my mother-in-law is here this weekend, replete with her very green thumb, and she’s graciously … Continue reading Gardening is like self-work (and I’m not the best at it)…